Horses, at least mine, seem to have a myriad assortment of ways to test our patience and spend our money. Of course sometimes it really is a toss up if it's worse to be on the sending or receiving end of these sorts of calls.
I'm pretty sure that when non-equestrians overhear certain conversations on riding that my friends and I have had, they are thoroughly disgusted and confused. I am only mildly sorry about this and mostly just amused.
Texts you would get from your horse this winter (... if they could use a phone
Not just for Dressage! For that 60 seconds before you go in when your horse is a lathered mess, he's still in his boots, you have mud all over your boots, and you're not quite sure were you laid your jacket down.